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Skittles5
  1. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    13th Apr 2009 11:16
    15 years, 7 months & 8 days ago
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
15 years, 7 months & 8 days ago
13th Apr 2009 11:16

Dear friends,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey, under a street light and I saw you sit on my boyfriend.
I'm sure you're retarded enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist.
I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep the oil tank from your car as a memory.
You should also know that I will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Please don???t hurt me,
Skittles5







NOW ITS YOUR TURN ! :

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1. What's the colour of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White ??? I???m joining the Convent
Black - I dislike your eyelashes
Green - Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a butt head
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - THEY wants you
No shirt - You're mean
Other - I'm in love with your cat

2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February - Last year when you peed your pants
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put hand cuffs on me
July ??? When you smacked my butt
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October - When I quoted Forest Gump
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad ??? As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chr??tien
Fish - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4. What's the colour of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put whipped cream on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5. What's the colour of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey ??? The President
Brown ??? Your ???My Little Pony??? collection
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red ??? My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My uterus
Pink ??? The Montreal Canadian???s goalie
None ??? My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
Other - The elephant in the corner

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs; Man
O.C.; Emotional
Hills ; Open
Heroes; Frostbitten
Lost; High
House; Sly
Simpsons; Cowardly
The news; Scarred
Idol; Masochistic
Family Guy; Senile
Top Model; Middle-class
Annat; Ashamed
Other:Retarded

7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed ??? That we???re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a gender-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumbass
Other - That your driving sucks

8. What's the colour of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - Your nose hair clippers
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from Vegas
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your Elton John poster
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your car

9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
C/D - The oil tank from your car
E/F - Your neighbour???s dog and fish
G/H - My virginity and your boxers
I/J - The results of that blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear and right shoe
M/N - Your suicide note and virginity
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your collection of butterflies
S/T - Your mom
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - Your glass eye
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Never will forget that night
E/F - Always wanted to break your legs
G/H ??? Hate your cooking
I/J ??? Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose killing
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Always will remember the pep talks
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven???t showered in a month
Y/Z ??? Am better off without you

11. What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink ??? I???m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda ??? I will haunt you when I???m incarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water ??? Thanks for the Cocaine
Cider ??? I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice ??? You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral water ??? You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate ??? Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Other ??? you should stop picking your nose

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand ??? Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the gender-change
France - Love always
Spain - Go drown yourself
China ??? You make me sick
Germany ??? Please don???t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt ???Kiss my butt
England??? With tears of sadness



Dear (friend`s name),

I don't really know how to tell you this, but (_1_). I think I realized it when (_2_), (_3_) and I saw you (_4_) (_5_).
I'm sure you're (_6_) enough to understand that (_7_).
I'm returning (_8_) to you, but I'll keep (_9_) as a memory.
You should also know that I (_10_) and (_11_).

(_12_)
(Your name)

tacofeva

I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our affair is over. I think I realized it when When your dwarf bit me, In your apartment and I saw you Sit on My boyfriend.
I'm sure you're Retarded enough to understand that How awful you are.
I'm returning Your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep The oil tank from your car as a memory.
You should also know that I Haven???t showered in a month and Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.

Warm tingly sensations
A person you know
114 years, 11 months & 27 days ago 23rd Nov 2009 19:56
 
=D
115 years, 2 months & 19 days ago 31st Aug 2009 17:50
 
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it When you put hand cuffs on me
Outside of your office and I saw you Pull the pants off of The elephant in the corner.I'm sure you're Middle-class enough to understand that That we???re related.
I'm returning The pictures from Vegas to you, but I'll keep Your mom as a memory You should also know that I Always will remember the pep talks and you should stop picking your nose



With tears of sadness
Sammy
115 years, 3 months & 15 days ago 4th Aug 2009 17:09
 
Dear Skittles,

I really don't know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it when I quoted Forrest Gump, in your closet and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner.
I'm sure you're sly enough to understand that there is no solution to you being a dumbass.
I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep the oil tank from your car as a memory.
You should also know that I will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard and I will haunt you when I???m incarnated as an Eskimo.

Go milk a cow,
iRose

115 years, 4 months & 5 days ago 17th Jul 2009 12:07
 
Dear stranger,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat.I think I realized it when you put hand cuffs on me, In your apartment and I saw you Sit on My father
.
I'm sure you're Retarded enough to understand that That I get turned on by garbage men.
I'm returning Your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep Your mom as a memory.
You should also know that I Told my psychiatrist about the bruises and I???m off to lead a new life as a lemon
.

sam
115 years, 4 months & 10 days ago 11th Jul 2009 18:45
 
Dear Stranger,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it when when your dwarf bit me, in your apartment and I saw you carve your initials into my father.
I'm sure you're retarded enough to understand that that your driving sucks.
I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory.
You should also know that I will try to forget that you broke my heart and I will haunt you when I???m incarnated as an Eskimo.

You make me sick,
Cool Person
115 years, 4 months & 26 days ago 26th Jun 2009 09:18
 
Dear strangers,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our socks don't match. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me outside of your office and I saw you sit on my boyfriend.
I'm sure you're retarded enough to understand how awful you are.
I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory.
You should also know that I always will remember the pep talks and I'm off to live my new life as a lemon.

You make me sick,
Syd
115 years, 5 months & 5 days ago 16th Jun 2009 11:29
 

Dear Skittles,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey in your car and I saw you pour syrup on my father. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your left ear and right shoe as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget that night and I'm off to live a new life as a lemon.

Best of luck on the gender-change
Peep
115 years, 5 months & 29 days ago 22nd May 2009 18:33
 
Dear Jordan,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I???m joining the Convent. I think I realized it when When I tripped on peanut butter, Under a street light and I saw you Carve your initials into My knee caps.
I'm sure you're Senile enough to understand that That your driving sucks.
I'm returning Your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your credit cards as a memory.
You should also know that I Told in my confession today about the moose killing and I???m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

With tears of sadness
(Your name)
115 years, 7 months & 1 day ago 20th Apr 2009 15:30
 
Dear Skittles,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our affair is over. I think I realized it when That night you picked your nose, In your closet and I saw you Sit on My father.
I'm sure you're Middle-class enough to understand that That I may pee my pants.
I'm returning Your old New Kids on the Block blanket to you, but I'll keep Your mom as a memory.
You should also know that I Always wanted to break your legs and you should stop picking your nose.

Best of luck on the gender-change,
Stuti

115 years, 7 months & 1 day ago 20th Apr 2009 15:18
 
  1. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    13th Apr 2009 11:16
    15 years, 7 months & 8 days ago